On New Stands Now

Shameless Self-Promotion Alert! Mango Mama and her lovely book club buddies are showcased in the current issue of O Home. I’ll admit, I’m buggin’ a bit, appearing in the same publication as the Divine Miss O, but more importantly, I hope folks will check out the book featured with our story, What is the What by David Eggers, because it’s an incredible story and all proceeds go to aiding the Sudanese in America and Sudan through the Valentino Achak Deng Foundation.

So check out the Fall 2008 issue of O Home, and our feature, A Novel Affair, and be sure to let me know if you can figure out which one of us is me--- Mango Mama!

Co-Opting Playdates and Time-Outs

In my last post, I mentioned hosting my book club meeting on Saturday afternoon. We had a great time catching up, discussing the book, eating and drinking sangria and pomegranate margaritas. I always enjoy this time because the women in the group are wonderful, warm, interesting and intelligent and I’m guaranteed to have a good time. In fact, I come to refer to these dates as a “mommy play date.” That’s right, I’ve co-opted the term “play date,” and just as I plan these important and vital activities with my kids’ friends and classmates to foster friendships and assist in the development of their social skills, I, too, see the need to identify and organize “adults only” activities so my brain doesn’t drift into atrophy as I raise my children and navigate parenthood.

I'll also share another secret--- sometimes instead of sending my kids to “time-out,” I put myself in “mommy time-out.” This one works like a charm, because I usually put myself in time-out right in the middle of some melt-down between Olivia /Yannick and instead of banishing them to their room to get themselves together and to “think about it,” I sashay off to the sanctity of my own bedroom, admonishing them not to disturb me until my time-out is over. I don't use this one too often, but when I hit them with this little role reversal, they're so dazed and confused they usually forget whatever they were fussing about. I’m convinced this little maneuver has saved my sanity on more than one occasion.

How to Raise a Reader

For me, reading is almost as essential as breathing. It hasn’t always been this way, when I was in kindergarten my dyslexia was diagnosed and I became extremely self-conscious when reading in front of my classmates. It wasn’t until 5th grade, when all of the tricks I’d learned from tutors seemed to click and reading became effortless for me. Since then, I’ve been a ferocious reader and books my constant companion.

As I headed into my teen years, I ripped through every Judy Blume I could put my hands on, from The Dog Ate My Homework, to Are You There God, It’s Me Margaret, and Deenie and who could forget Forever? All the girls in my 7th grade class passed this book around with underlined passages detailing the PG-13 sex scenes.

I admire the way folks remember a specific song marking a personal milestone, like… “when I was a dating Mr. X in 1992, so and so was always playing on the radio,” but for me, I’ve marked milestones by what I was reading at the time. For instance, the first care package my mom sent in college included a paperback copy of The Color Purple and the cover was stained because the jar of peanut butter my mom included in the package cracked and leaked in transit. I had just finished reading Coming Through Slaughter by Michael Ondaaatje, on May 22, 1998, the day I met Loverman. Days before I’d finished Chasin’ the Train by J.C. Thomas. Some people need a little cocktail to relax, but for me a stroll through Borders, usually puts my mind at ease.

So, if reading is fundamental to raising intelligent and insightful children, what steps can adults take to engage children in reading? Here are a few we use in our household and I welcome any additional suggestions:

1. Read to your children daily
2. Surround yourself with books
3. Let your children see you read, children mirror their parents behavior
4. Take your kids to the library and let them select age-appropriate books
5. Be flexible, encourage reading in any form, my son loves comic books
6. Talk to your kids about what they’re reading
7. Let your kids know how much you enjoy reading